Common Mistakes People Make When Getting A Divorce
Getting a divorce is not a piece of cake as it doesn’t only involve emotional turbulence but also requires a lot of paperwork and law proceedings. A lot goes into paperwork, and dealing with everything together can land you in a position where you won’t be able to negotiate properly.
Hiring a professional lawyer can save you a lot of trouble and allow you to negotiate your terms. It will ensure that the technical aspect of your divorce is taken care of.
To help you avoid some basic errors that could prove to be costly, Chin & Orr Lawyers has put together a list of the most common mistakes people make when getting a divorce.
1. Basing their position on what their friends have gone through or received during their separation
Every situation is different. What Amy did or had to pay for or where the children stayed is normally unique to her situation and, although similar to yours, not the same. The best advice is to get legal advice as early as possible. Make an appointment with a lawyer so you can figure out what is important and put a plan together to get you to the next stage of your life. A good lawyer will care about the outcome and help you determine what is important.
2. Focusing on little issues that cause things to derail and create huge emotional and financial scars that last years
Whether you like it or not, the relationship and family you built took two people, and the ideal separation process will involve the agreement of you and your spouse. A Trade list is a template for you and your lawyer to work with so that you can get to a negotiated or court-ordered settlement as quickly as possible. A Trade list consists of a “want column”, and a “give column.” The “want column” has things you want like custody, child or spousal support, living in the family home, furniture, etc. The hook is that for every ‘want’, you must put a ‘give’ of equal importance or value on the list. Be honest, take as much time as you need and be fair. In the end, you will have a working document that will help you and your lawyer focus on what is important to you, hopefully, reach a successful settlement and save you hours of emotional stress and legal costs.
3. Making decisions based on their emotions, usually anger but sometimes guilt
This results in a prolonged conflict and takes a toll on all parties. In exceptional cases, this may be warranted, but separation is a mathematical calculation in most situations, and the outcome of a prolonged court battle can usually be predicted early on. Get the figures early, ask your lawyer what the estimated cost would be to obtain more than what you are legally entitled to, and make your decisions based on a price vs. benefit analysis. If you have to consider receiving less, always consider the legal cost of forcing your position. Again, remember that money you spend on legal fees is rarely reimbursed to you by the courts, so the money you spend there is money that you or your children will not get. Where children are involved in Ontario, the major consideration is what is in the children’s best interest. This answer will differ depending on which party you ask, so mediation with a mediator specializing in family law is often a good idea.
To avoid these and other mistakes, reach out to the experts at Chin & Orr Lawyers.
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